President Clinton's Testimony"� by Dr. Seuss

� I did not do it in a car

� � I did not do it in a bar

� � I did not do it in the dark

� � I did not do it in the park

� � I did not ever fornicate

� � I did not do it at a dance

� I did not do it in her pants

� � I did not get beyond first base

� � I did not do it in her face

� I never did it in a bed

� If you think that, you've been misled

� I did not do it with a groan

� I did not do it on the phone

� I did not cause her dress to stain

� I never boinked Saddam Hussein

� I did not do it with a whip

� I never fondled Linda Tripp

� I never acted really silly

� With volunteers like Kathleen Willey

� There was one time, with Margaret Thatcher

� I chased her 'round, but could not catch her

� No kinky stuff, not on your life

� I wouldn't, even with my wife

� And Gennifer Flowers' tale of woes

� Was paid for by my right-wing foes

� And Paula Jones, and those State Troopers

� Are just a bunch of party poopers

� I did not hang them out to dry

� I did not do it last November

� But if I did, I don't remember

� I did not do it in the hall

� I could have, but I don't recall

� I never did it in my study

� I never did it with my dog, Buddy

� I never did it to Sox, the cat

� I might have-once-with Arafat

� I never did it in a hurry

� I never groped Ms. Betty Currie

� There was no sex at Arlington

� There was no sex on Air Force One

� I might have copped a little feel

� And then endeavored to conceal

� But never did these things so lewd

� At least, not ever in the nude

� These things to which I have confessed

� They do not count, if we stayed dressed

� It never happened with cigar

� I never dated Mrs. Starr

� I did not know this little sin

� Would be retold on� CNN

� I broke some rules my Mama taught me

� I tried to hide, but now you've caught me

� But I implore, I do beseech

� Do not condemn, do not impeach

� I might have got a little tail

�